oh hey. just checking in on this wild and crazy friday night. and by wild and crazy i mean both kids are already asleep and i’m in my pajamas in bed ready to watch netflix. at 7:30. i am actually just living the dream over here! and no, that’s not sarcasm... i am definitely majorly introverted so this is basically recharging my batteries from all the social situations i’ve had today.

it was actually a MAJOR social situation and it majorly wore me out. im talking ‘bout the dmv.
i finally went and got me a cal-i-for-ni-ayyy drivers license. and california license plates. and i’m actually really sad about it, mostly because i feel like i’m cheating on texas, but also because my texas drivers license picture was from 2011 right after i got married and i was all tan and skinny and cute. today, i was all sweaty and pale and... fluffy. ugh. oh and they  majorly zoom in on your face so i’m actually really dreading what this picture is going to look like 😩 and also, WHY ON EARTH do they put your weight on your license here?!?!? that is rude, and unnecessary.
they did make me take a written exam... i made a perfect score 💁🏼‍♀️ duh.

all this driving talk got me thinking about some big news i forgot to share... the other day, for the first time in my life, i PARALLEL PARKED. 🎉 🎉 🎉
i was so proud of myself. it was such a tense situation because i had never done it, and it was literally the only spot to park for a doctor appointment that was in 5 minutes. so i just had to go for it. and i did it. i give all the glory to God, of course. and my backup camera did alright too.

this week has been exhausting. eli is still extra snotty and presley is just... three and crazy.
we went to walmart a couple days ago and we were walking down an aisle and presley SHOUTS, “look at that BIG LADY!”... twice. i actually died for a second. THANK GOODNESS the lady(the only other person on the aisle with us)  didn’t turn around. i honestly hope that she didn’t even hear presley (but her volume is always turned up to 11, so...🙈). i immediately put my finger up to my mouth to shush her and quickly ran the other way while reminding presley we can’t talk like that.
motherhood, y’all. it’s a blast.

it’s 8:30 and everyone (except me) in my house has been asleep for an hour. yes, even randy.
presley’s nose started running yesterday, and this morning eli woke up snotty too.
and then randy comes home from work... with the man cold. lord help us all.

so, i’ll probably have it by the end of the week. you know, just in time for the weekend. (but what are weekends, again? california has put me on team “no days off”... sigh. i miss you mom 😂)

ugh. we JUST GOT OVER THIS MESS. 😡

anyway. did anyone watch roseanne?! i’ve been so excited about it since i heard it was coming back. i used to watch reruns all the time back in high school. idk why, but i’m weirdly drawn to sitcoms about middle class surburban families. for instance, the middle is probably my favorite tv show. i watch it nearly everyday on hallmark (duh.) but back to roseanne. randy kept saying that he “couldn’t believe i was going to watch that garbage”, and that “roseanne has never been funny”, and he was “definitely NOT gonna watch it.” and then last wednesday he asked if i watched the new roseanne. of course i had forgotten, because “i’m losing my mind!”. but then he said, “it has great reviews. it did so good and”... blahblahblah. so i was like, “are you saying you want to watch it with me?” and he was all “idk maybe.” and then we watched it that night before bed and he laughed out loud like, 84 times. i kept having to explain things to him that he wouldn’t have known if he didn’t watch the old one, but other than that... HE LOVED IT. so, that was a fun thing.

does anyone else’s husbands read reviews for everything? no? just mine?
he is a planner, there’s no doubt about it. and he WILL NOT be wasting his time/money/appetite on a tv show/movie/restaurant/golf course/anything on amazon, if there are less than 4 stars or 90% on rotten tomatoes. i can’t tell you how many movies i’ve longed(😂) to see, but my hopes were dashed because some losers over at rotten tomatoes gave it a 43.

i’ll leave you tonight with a couple “presleyisms”
we were in the car and we were trying to keep eli awake so we could come home and nap and i was telling presley to talk to him. she said she didn’t know what to talk to him about 🙄, so i was telling her things to say... like, “you’re the best brother ever”, and “i love you brother bear!”, and then finally, “you’re so stinkin cute!”—so she tells him. then she says “mommy, is it because he tooted?”

also, last week we went to tour two preschools for presley for next year. after leaving the second one, i asked her which she liked better. she said “i really loved the first pretty school better”. so, from
now on, we are only going to call it “pretty school” because why would i ever correct that?! 😍😂

shes always talking, always asking questions that she already knows how she wants answered. in the car they sometimes go like this... “mommy can we go to the car wash?” and i’ll say, “maybe tomorrow baby.” and she’ll say “today tomorrow?” whatever that means. and i’ll say “tomorrow tomorrow.” and at this point i’ve started to tune her out a bit and she’ll keep talking about who knows what and she says, “ok mommy?” and i’ll just say “yeah baby.” and then it happens. my high school grammar teacher comes out of her mouth and she  YELLS at me— “DONT SAY YEAH, SAY YES.”
and this happens like at least 8 times a day, and that is definitely not an exaggeration. i’m not kidding. i get chastised for saying “yeah” by a 3 year old. daily.

and i feel bad not mentioning brother bear and his shenanigans. he’s not much of a talker yet, but i swear he mimics something new everyday. a couple months ago, everything and anything you asked or told him, he would shake his head no. it was hilarious. “eli is daddy your favorite?” ::shakes his head no:: YESSSS I KNEW IT! (a total lie. he is daddy’s biggest fan). but now he knows how to shake his head yes and it’s my favorite thing. he puts his eyebrows up and his head up at the same time very dramatically and brings them down slowly. 😂😂 he is all boy. his favorite place to be is outside, his favorite toys are ALL BALLS, and his favorite thing to do to drive me crazy is get in the trash can 🤢. he pulls things out, and puts things in (some trash, mostly NOT trash.). i have to inspect the top layer every time i open it to make sure there aren’t any toys or keys or wallets in there.
even though he’s a total daddy’s boy, he’s still my baby and only wants me when he’s tired or not feeling well.

i have the best babies ever, and even with a “man cold” my husband is pretty great too 😜, and sometimes i can’t believe this life is mine. i was looking at our selfie from yesterday and thinking “how did this all happen... been together for 9 years, have TWO kids, and in california?” it’s been a whirlwind, but i love it and i wouldn’t change a thing. i am SO BLESSED.

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT - i have committed to a middle part.
no, this isn’t an april fools joke. i have been side parting since college, and the time has come that i reunite with my high school middle part.
having babies took a toll on my hair. forget the way the back of my hair now gets nasty kinky curls when it’s wet (yes, just the back. it’s the dumbest thing.) i’ve come to begrudgingly accept  these weird wispy baby hairs on my temples that look like bat ears, and the fact that they will probably never grow out. the side part just put them on major display, and i am tired of giving them a spotlight.

photo brought to you by tripod and self timer

having kids changings a lot of things, obviously. noticeably, it changes your body (hello stretch marks, belly pooch, and previously mentioned baby hairs). it also changes your mental state... basically it makes you LOSE YOUR MIND. anytime i say those words,  “i’m losing my mind!”, randy quickly reminds me that you can’t lose something that’s already gone. touché. but it also changes things like holidays.

for instance, you might think you love christmas before you have kids. you might think it can’t get any better than BEING a kid at christmas. but buddy, you are WRONG. having a kid at christmas is the best thing in the entire world. it’s just... magical. 

Easter is no exception... it has always been a special holiday for me. but with kids, it’s like on another level. you put yourself in Jesus’ sandals and there is no doubt you’d make the same choice to save YOUR children. it’s overwhelming to imagine that someone LITERALLY DIED FOR ME. not just me, but every single person that has ever lived and that will continue to be born in this world. Jesus sacrificed the ultimate sacrifice... his LIFE, so that we could live free from our sins. it takes my breath away to think about it. 

from the moment i woke up, today was hard. 

my mom texted, and i told her i was sad. i know she’s sad too. i get a pit in my stomach thinking about a holiday when my kids aren’t with me. 

i had to clean up my eye makeup a dozen times before we even left for church. 

once we got there, they announced that there were so baptisms. three kids. i can’t help myself but to get emotional during baptisms. especially kids. i was young myself when i found myself saved and baptized. i can still remember the feeling that came over me when i accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. 

today, the youth minister was doing the baptisms and the last one was his daughter. he was so choked up, and he basically said that there was nothing better than seeing your child love and accept Christ. i have so much hope and excitement for the day Presley and Eli find themselves there. i pray about it everyday. -side note. a couple years ago my nephew jayden was saved at church camp. a few months prior i had been praying for my sisters family to find a church and God answered my prayers by not only finding them a church, but jayden got connected and he found God. i cried like a baby when i heard the news, so i can only imagine the emotions i’ll feel when it’s my babies turn.  

anyway, back to the baptism. spoiler alert. i cried. the whole time. 

the message was so good. we have been doing a series on the parables so our preacher tied in the parable of the lost son to the easter message, and it was powerful... i cried. 

then at the end, we sang old rugged cross. and i cried some more. my dad always said it’s not easter unless you sing old rugged cross at church. 😂

usually after church we would head to my grandmas house to eat roast or whatever she had cooking. i had intentions of cooking a roast today, but never made it to the store. instead, we ate at the diner we eat at every other sunday. i’d give anything for grandmas cookin right now. anything. honestly i’d give anything to be in the same state as my grandma, or anyone in my family, right now. 

after lunch we came home and put the kids down for a nap, and i came upstairs to cry. 

i know i shouldn’t be so down about anything. and please don’t mistake this as being ungrateful for the abundance of blessings i have. i just miss my family, both our families. 

i do know that God has us right where he wants us, but even still, He doesn’t always make things easy. He gives us more than we can handle because we aren’t meant to handle it alone. He is my strength.